Saturday, February 20, 2016

Mediocre Update on Dad

The phone rang very late last night. It was the night staffer from my parents' facility calling to let me know an ambulance had arrived to transport Dad to hospital due to severe dehydration. No surprise. Mom went to check on him just before 10pm and he was breathing oddly and in such a deep sleep he would not wake up. When she did manage to rouse him and spoke to him, his mouth started moving but he couldn't get any words out at first.  She thought he'd had a stroke, but he passed all the tests with the paramedics with flying colours, so likely not. Thank goodness! By the time they arrived he was sitting up and talking. They ran more tests, told him dehydration was the problem and told him he did not require a trip to the hospital if he would agree to drink the rest of the concoction from the pharmacist. Mom asked Dad if he would be afraid to fall asleep again if he stayed home and he said he would, so she had the paramedics load him up and take him to hospital for an IV drip overnight. He refused to allow her to come along. She was hurt until I reminded her he would be stressed worrying about how she would get home in the middle the night, would feel obligated to put on an act that he felt better than he actually did...why he thinks he has to do that we do not know and mom hates it, but that is what he does, always has. I also suspect some other symptom that he did not share with her frightened him badly and he didn't want her to know about it. Our family has a complex system of secrets and lies that I have never much secrecy over things that are not important enough to be kept private, or for other bizarre reasons. The idea of lying for the sake of supposedly not upsetting someone who is going to find out anyway and then also be hurt or angry for being kept out of the loop makes no sense to me, but that is how Dad does things. So be it. It is never worth the explosion if Mom and I try to do things more openly and honestly. Maybe my paternal grandma and her family were the same way, I don't know where else he would have picked up that behaviour.

So, now I am waiting to hear from Mom after she talks to the hospital this morning. Hopefully Dad is getting better and will be home soon. Poor Mom, because of the quarantine conditions, has not been able to take all the soiled sheets, towels and pajamas to the laundry, so has washed everything in the suite with her arthritic fingers. She has things hanging to dry everywhere. No wonder she is as exhausted as Dad is. I pray she will remain healthy!

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