Last night my parents called. They wanted to know if I could eat my dinners each evening with them at their facility. I knew something was up because they know very well I can't eat anything on that menu, never have been able to. However, I was just a tad unprepared for what they said next because after all these years I have NEVER learned....sigh.....
After some hemming and hawing they told me that they don't want me going out for dinner by myself because it is too dangerous for me to be out (at 5pm in the broad daylight, in a car) by myself. "This city has changed you know dear."
O dear God, give me strength to keep my temper in check, to realize they are becoming more paranoid and ridiculous then ever due to their age, which they cannot help. Help me to set aside this new stress about my next visit there and please help my OCD to just let it go. Thank you, amen!
The upsetting part is that now it is not only my father who is ordering me at my age to obey his commands, my mother has jumped onto the bandwagon with him. Sigh......it is going to be an interesting four days as they attempt to bind me to them in the absence of my husband who is my greatest protector when I am with my family.
If I can just set this latest sillyness aside, take on the mentality that they are BOTH a couple of eldercare clients now and thus deal well with their fears for my safety, ("...because after all dear, if something happens to you what will happen to US??") , I will be able to deal patiently and at least somewhat lovingly with the pair of them.
What a difficult time it is for people my age whose parents are living such long and increasingly unhappy lives. I feel badly for my parents because I see them becoming more upset about all manner of things as the months go on. It is my turn to have to be the helpful, understanding adult child as millions and billons of people have before me. I hope and pray that I am up to the task. My sister in law and my husband handled their aging parents so very well despite the incredible stresses put upon them, particularly my sister in law. I am going to draw on her/their example as I enter this part of my parents' lives and find my niche in caring for them.
Please may I be physically healthy enough, spiritually mature enough, emotionally detached enough to handle the stresses and be a true help to my parents.